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Liberal Church Upbringing: I was raised in the Lutheran Christian tradition. This is a protestant tradition is based on each person's right to read and interpret the Bible and the Gospels for themselves. It is believed that each individual must grow their own personal and private relationship with God through Jesus. I have always had a theological and philosophical mind and an artistic nature. The Lutheran church of the 1970's fed me fully in these areas. Christian mysticism and work with the gifts of the Holy Spirit were a central part of my early childhood and also the wedge of division between members of my childhood church.

It was traumatic for my family as we left what felt to me a haven of tangible spiritual activity for the more doctrinal liturgy of the newly forming congregation. The hardest part was finding a physical outlet for prayer. One day I told my grandmother that I didn't like praying in church because sometimes I want to cry or sing or jump up and down when I pray. She took me by the hand, led me to the painting of Jesus praying at Gethsemene that always hung in her living room and said, "Kari, you can always pray in nature like Jesus did. He went into nature to pray at the most important times in his life. If you feel like praying with songs or shouts, go into nature."

Nature spirituality is very deep and present in Norse tradition and my grandmother's advise was wonderful for me and confirmed my earliest spiritual experiences which happened in a willow tree. Energetic communication with the tree and a few of the birds and squirrels that came there was normal for me.

I had very early theological experiences which I remember well. The earliest I remember was as a pre-school child. I was sitting and spinning on my bum the way children do, talking with my mother. As I spun I asked her "if God created everything, who created God?" Ah, the age old dilema of prior existence. Her inability to answer this question stopped me spinning, my first "ah ha." There are mysteries which even my mother can not shed light on.

The first non-Christian deity came to me as a 13 year old atop the Pyramid of the Sun at Teotihuacan near Mexico City. There was a tangible energy surrounding my body and I felt at once connected to the Earth and the Sun. I had felt this way many times in my willow tree at home and was not frightened by it. I felt like a pillar. And then the "otherness" of the energy began to filter in. The pressence of Chac Mool entered into my heart space where once only Jesus lived.

His visit there was gentle but shocking. I felt my consciousness recede in a way that I didn't like. It was as though Jesus and Chac Mool had some business to attend to and I was just a vehicle. I had never had a mystical experience outside of Christianity and this was older, deeper, at once foreign and familiar. It was the familiarity of this utterly foreign energy that shook me up, I think. I began to wonder what other religions and spiritual traditions I might encounter!

Female Divinity and Connection to the Earth: My childhood home was across the street from the Catholic church, St. Mary of the Lake. In the Lutheran tradition we are taught that God is neither male nor female. Yet we call God him, father, lord and other masculine names. We do not have Mary as a divine figure for women to relate to, or saints, or angels really. The Conservative Lutheranism of my later years was, for me, devoid of connection to the feminine and bland in terms of ritual.

We used to ride bikes through the church gardens as kids. Every time I passed the statue I felt a lovely chill. But one time, I boldly stopped, knelt before her, and crossed myself. I felt that same powerful flooding of energy, the pillar of connection, and the otherness that came from experiencing something outside of my education. I cried when I began to feel myself as a female understanding that God was my Mother, not just my Father. This experience opened me to new understandings and a new relationship to Jesus. I began to see that Mary was his mother and I am his sister and she is my mother too. I later describe this experience in the song Remember Me.

I began winding my way backwards from the Protestant present to the Catholic, gnostic, and eventually pre-Christian religions that Christianity built its traditions on wherever it went. What I discovered was that the older the religion/spiritual practice, the more Mother oriented it was.

Spirituality and Religion began to show their peculiarities. My family had a nature spirituality that stemmed from my farmer ancestors. My earliest memories are in trees, the garden, the woods and fields of my Grandmother's land. My mothers cousin who we called Uncle Pete, used to take us on nature walks. He would show us which plants to eat, which ones were medicinal, which ones we must never touch. I pass this knowlege and the awesomeness of Nature on through my work in sustainable urban environments and emphasis on the nature spiritual tradition of my Nordic heritage.

My father took us up to the Boundary Waters and we learned the Spiritual depth that Earth calls us into. My mother was the original recycler and a Shaklee Distributer from the 1970s. We crushed cans, saved bags, filled the wood box to save on gas, we had large gardens, and we held the "Modern Medical World" at a safe distance for when bones needed setting and such. My Elementary School, Sunset Hill, had and continues to have a nature center and an environmental curriculum that mirrored my education at home. It was a progressive "Free to Be You and Me" school. We entered the building by saying "I like myself unconditionally" and we left with dirty fingernails from planting trees and native grasses. It was bliss in so many ways. We were introduced to meditation and shown the film of Johnathan Livingston Seagull every year. Higher order thinking skills were engaged on every level.

As mentioned above, I knew, experienced and embraced the energy of unity with the natural world. This is the world God made for me, so why should I fear it? When plants and animals express themselves to us humans, we need to stay still, quiet, and listen. They are communicating all the time through how and where they are growing, through how they look and smell and feel, by what they are willing to do for us. We must find our place beside them. This is what I grew up believing and this belief permeates my art today!

Music integrates my soul: I always sang and danced. Formally I studied the Suzuki Zen method of violin begining at age 6. When I began to study voice in school and privately, the lessons always had a spiritual connection. When we sing, our bodies are the instrument. We vibrate and become unified with the vibration of life! The choir room was an early training ground for mystical experience. As I studied theater, I became aware of the dangers of other personalities intruding on my soul. A difficulty pointed out by Socrates, I would later discover. The assumption of a character does affect and inform one's soul. I later decided against acting as a career based on these experiences. Though theatrical presentation is beneficial to the soul and I do much of this in my work today.

1980 - 1990
Scholarship Takes Hold: A student at Wayzata High School, (graduating in 1984) I was lucky enough to be introduced to world religions and I studied Zen Budhism and Taoism reading these influential works:

"The Tao Te Ching" by Lao Tsu

"Johnathan Livingston Seagull" and "Illusions" by Richard Bach

"The Awakening of Zen" by Suzuki

I could relate to these philosophies intimatly as I had early Zen experiences as a Suzuki violin student. I began training in the Martial Arts at this time and was able to physically practice what I was intellectually able to grasp.

I studied quantum theory and read the books:

"The Tao of Physics" by Fritjof Capra

"The Dancing Wu Li Masters" by Gary Zukav

"The Ascent of Man" by Jacob Bronowski

I also read the works of Plato at this time which really influenced me to probe more deeply into my own philosophy of reality.

"Dialogues" and "Republic" by Plato

Socrates' method of dialectic and it's opposite, sophism, and the types of culture these ways of seeing and behaving in the world create, caused me to observe more closely my own handed down traditions, thought patterns, and ways of relating to others and creating community. Self examination was always part of the Lutheran tradition, theologically speaking. What's more, Socrates' teacher was a woman.

As I described, my life was a constant flow of education and sprituality and my mystical experiences were continuous. The older the religion, the more it viewed god as Mother.

Other Teachers: I had the opportunity to study with Starhawk in the mid-80's when she came to Minneapolis. Through her work I was able to give ritualized attention to my body as an extention of the natural world. I began to chart my menstrual cycles and found them to be mirrored in the moon cycles. I began to see the ancient holy days as astronomical events and began to make real connections to the cycles of life and death. These studies led me to do the Discovering Origins/Building Traditions Project.

I read these books:

"Spiral Dance" by Starhawk

"When God Was a Woman" by Merlin Stone

"Hero With a Thousand Faces" and
"The Power of Myth" by Joseph Campbell

A variety of books on ESP and psychic phenomenon...really about anything I could get my hands on.

At this time I also voraciously consumed all I could of Arthurian legend material and Celtic mythology.

Reading and studying about spirituality, psychology and religion was important, but as an artist I am an experiential learner. Humans need to experience their learning (as Kierkegard pointed out) and ritual is how we put our knowlege into practice. It's how we integrate our bodies, minds, and spirits.

Eastern Religion and Practice: I continued my studies in Martial Arts, adding Fencing to my Shotokan Karate (and in the late 80's moving to Tai Chi Chuan.) These studies have grown into my Staving work today.

Through this I began to understand the energetic body - the mechanics behind my mystical experiences - the "Tao of Physics" in practice! I read books on the Chakras and Eastern spirituality and medicine and eventually to the practice of Feng Shui :

"Chakras for Beginners" by David Pond

"The 7 Healing Chakras" by Brenda Davies

"Staying Healthy with the Seasons" by E. Haas (highly reccomended, I still use this every week)

On the Buddhist side of things I was introduced to the practice of Nichiren Buddhism by friend Sara Beadle who still practices today! I have integrated the chant Nam Myoho Renge Kyo into the Discovering Origins/Building Traditions Project shows.

European Pre-Christian Practice: I began to attend "Full Moon Dances" with the goup Silver Circle. This group still meets and is the oldest running public ritual group in Minneapolis. Here is a link to Earth House. They have assumed the running of Silver Circle as well as running the Coffee Cauldron. Both events are monthly opportunities for people to come and ask questions and share experiences. Very non-threatening, community building, and welcoming, I reccomend these events to anyone and often bring my children!

Interestingly enough, I found the ritual of the Catholic tradition with it's inscence, kneeling, crossing oneself, standing, singing, elaborate iconography and the use of Latin to give me a similar "rush" as the pagan circle ceremonies as well as the Budhist practice. There is a calling to worship and engagement of all the senses with candles, inscense, prayer beads and bells, and a closure to the service that ends in community building activities such as eating and talking.

I began to read Carl Jung's work:
"The Archetypes and the Collective Unconcious"

This helped me to see the variety of dieties as aspects of our cultural collective psyche. The Mothergod is my yin and the Fathergod is my yang sides. My animus and anima, my left and right brain, can be personified in the aspects of the dieties.

Again, however, there is a fear that I was instructed in from the begining of my life. The fear of Satan, the adversary. A fear that if I explore too far I will stray from the path of righteousnes and put my immortal soul in danger of an eternity of damnation. Yikes!

My sister one time asked me about this. My response to her, and to all who inquire, is that based on my early personal relationship with Jesus, I am always at liberty to ask him directly if my studies and the revelations and spiritual experiences I am gaining through them are harmful to me. And, he answers me. We have a long history of talking with one another.

As I studied the history of religion I realized, I was studying the codification of the evolution of human conciousness. And I am seeing the million aspects of the Divine. I also realized that the literature supporting who God is was written by humans with their own cultural filters, needs, and historical contexts.

Higher Education: I went to Luther College in Decorah, Iowa in 1984. There I studied a variety of Christain theologies including the Gnostic Gospels, Liberation Theology, and Christian Humanism.

"I and Thou" by Martin Buber was an influential work.

"Fear and Trembling" by Kierkegard and his other works helped me to put my life's experiences and my unique relationship with the Divine into an adult perspective.

And studies in Archeology, particularly the book:

"Cows, Pigs, Wars and Witches" by Marvin Harris allowed me to put religion into historical and political perspective.

At The College of St. Thomas in St. Paul, MN I was lucky enough to study a variety of spiritual traditions with Christians who were examples of bridging and unifying ancient shamanic practice and modern Christainity. There were many profound and life altering experiences during these years.

I began to study dream work, which I still use today as a major tool for doing personal work and aiding others in their paths. I studied with some Lakota women who introduced me to sweats and other ritual. I also began to study alternative forms of healing with herbs, crystals, energy, massage, vision quest and past life regression with friend and colleague Betty Bigelbach and others.

Some of the classes I had were in Biblical studies with Dr. Gale Yee. Understanding the Bible in the context of those who wrote it was essential to my ability to interpret it further for myself. Especially "the Satan" of Job. When looking at the developmental psychology of God as portrayed in the Bible, I can see the multiplex of dieties in the creation stories, the unified or Monotheistic concept and, as in the book of job, the polarized yin and yang God. It was at this time that I no longer saw the "devil" in the childhood fear state. Coming to this understanding allowed me to plunge more deeply into my other studies.

My Nordic Roots
The most profound experience at St. Thomas was my introduction to the Norse Rune Alphabet in a linguistics class taught by Dr. Luanne Dummer. She was astonished that I had never heard of the runes, knowing my spiritual explorations ran deep. 1989 began a life long study of runes, Norse myths and traditions. This is the basis for all of my work today in scholarship, performance art, and the spirituality that expresses my life on a daily basis.

From 1990 to 2003:

My life as a singer songwriter, healer, ritualist, and multimedia performance artist took off! With roots as deep and profound as I have been blessed with and a society that allows freedom of expression and spiritual exploration, my out pouring artistically is limitless. I am grateful, humbled by the profound nature of my life, and excited to share my vision with others so that they too may learn and grow into their own unique spiritual selves!

2003 to the present:

I began the path of the Völva in 2003, studying the lore, history, archeology, folk songs and stories of the staff carrying women on Norse Tradition. I developed a training program called Völva Stav, based on the use of staff and tein (short stick) for use in rhythm and chant for creating a seidr state. I teach within the cultural context of my ancestral folkways, the things it took me a lifetime to learn, integrate, and express. In 2007 I was blessed to be able to write my rune book. As you explore the bibliography, you will find the fullness of my life's influences. I have also published the Völva Stav Manual to assist in learning the ways of the staff carrier.

The Runes: A Human Journey (2007) and the Völva Stav ManualVölva Stav Manual (2010).

Four CDs are available as digital downloads. These original and traditional songs tell this same story in music: Here